My farther is a carpenter, when I was born he was working in Gansu province, he was a stranger to me when he first came home.
From my eyes he was a bad man, I don't want to see him. I would think about my farther when saw bad guys in movies.
One year, he came home with a green old bike, he bought the bike from a postman with half of his yearly income.
My mother went to welcome him by the road, I sat on a dray pulled by her, the road was several kilometers away from home. He was with two large baggages, full of tools.He bought a dogskin hat for my grandpa but no present for me.
One summer he came home with a sewing machine on his shoulder pole, from then on my mother began to making clothes with it.
When I was eight, my farther built the first brick house in the village, we were admired by all the villagers.
He no longer went out, and started to make furniture at home. For many times my mother awakened me to see a new piece of furniture made by him.
He was appointed as the "production captain" in the village. One night he came home very late, his clothes was torn, button off.
My farther is with fine technique of making furniture, many people came with tuition to meet him. There were always several young in my home, they all want to learn his craftmanship. He was very strict with his students, if they made bad furniture he will burst into anger and destroy all the furniture. For one time I saw him slapped on one of his student's face.
Using his left over materials I made myself wooden guns, swards, and spears, those were my happiest memories.
Once a student of my farther drew a tiger on a piece of paper, I saw him did it. From then on I fell in love with painting, I painted tigers, birds and flowers, and worriers.
I stayed in house all days and drew pictures on bed, my father was very angry, he said I was an idiot. Once he tore all my pictures that I spent the entire morning to draw, I cried and could not stop.
Looking my farther drew on the furniture was my favorite, these days the furniture was painted by hand, he drew the structure first, then brush it with brushes, the last step was to paint it with lacquer.
My farther could not make much money with his craftmanship, and the economic situation was deteriorating, he tried may ways but all failed, lost a lot of money.
Finally my father went out with the construction team. He had been to Xiamen, Fujian, Daqing, and Heilongjiang, hard worked for years but made very little money.
My farther became easily go angry, and always quarrel with my sister, my sister went away from home after a big fight with my farther one time. Several days later she was found. At that time I hate my farther, I even thought to kill him.
Once I fought with the son of a factory head in town, I lost, my farther slapped me on my face, he thought I was useless. Two months later we hit the the guy with a bat at midnight in his home.
My farther started to plant apple trees, crop land became fruit garden. For his care, we had a big apple harvest several years later, gradually my farther became good at pruning.
My farther don't support me to continue my study, he want me to become a good carpenter. He started to teach me hand by hand, and our house became a workshop again. One year later I was admitted to the Suzhou Art and Design School. I felt so lucky these days because I can leave the village, leave my farther, and don't have to be a carpenter.
My farther don't like to receive my letter, because at the end of each letter I would ask him for money. Later he told me that the money were all borrowed.
Every time when I was on vacation at home, I will quarrel with him. I think he don't know art at all, but like to criticize my works. According to his request I drew a portrait of my grandmother, I used a special drawing technique but he thought I made my grandmother looked bad, he was furious and torn up an old picture with him holding me in his arms.
My farther always appear in my dreams, once I dreamed that my farther passed away, my mother and I did not feel sad, just felt that life is too short.
Every time I phoned home, my mother answers it, my farther seldom talks with me. I have never told him about what happened to me while I am away from home.
Once he doubted about my choice of becoming an artist, I told him firmly: what I have decided no one can change.He surprisingly looking at me, no longer talking.
He is not so easily getting angry, many things are now deciding by my mother, he don't play cards, don't drink, only smoking. He always keep a certain distance with everyone.
He kept many birds in the house my grandmother used to live, one day he asked me, like me seeing the birds that I raise, do you feel great when seeing your works? I said yes, the birds are your works.
